The Wife Of Bath's Prologue
 
Modern English
                                                                                                 
 The Wife of Bath Defends Her Rights to Re-Marriage and to the
    Enjoyment of Her Sexuality
 
1        Experience, though no authority                                        
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
2        Were in this world, were good enough for
me,                  
3        To speak of woe that is in all marriage;                             
4        For, masters, since I was twelve years of
age,            
5        Thanks be to God Who is for aye alive,                       
6        Of husbands at church door have I had
five;               
7        For men so many times have wedded me;                         
 The church teaches that re-marriage is forbidden, and it
    cites Scripture to defend its teaching.   Jesus only went to one wedding, the one at Cana in
    Galilee. (Therefore, one should only marry once?)   Also, Jesus reproved the Samaritan for having had five husbands:
    the one to whom she was married was not her real husband. (By implication,
    only the first was legitimate. Any more would be bigamy.) 
 
8        And all were worthy men in their degree.                          
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
9        But someone told me not so long ago                                
10      That since Our Lord, save once, would
never go         
11      To wedding (that at Cana in Galilee),                           
12      Thus, by this same example, showed He me               
13      I never should have married more than once.
            
14      Lo and behold! What sharp words, for the
nonce,       
15      Beside a well Lord Jesus, God and
man,                     
16      Spoke in reproving the Samaritan:                               
17      'For thou hast had five husbands,' thus said
He,         
18      'And he whom thou hast now to be with thee               
19      Is not thine husband.' Thus He said
that day,              
20      But what He meant thereby I cannot say;                   
21      And I would ask now why that same fifth man             
22      Was not husband to the Samaritan?                             
23      How many might she have, then, in marriage?
           
24      For I have never heard, in all my age,                                
25      Clear exposition of this number shown,                             
 However, The Wife of Bath can cite scripture in defense
    of remarriage:   : Be fruitful and multiply. : Men should leave mother and father and cleave unto a
    wife (no number specifically mentioned.) : Wise old King Solomon had several wives, and he
    enjoyed them all.
 
26      Though men may guess and argue up and down.               
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
27      But well I know and say, and do not lie,                            
28      God bade us to increase and multiply;                         
29      That worthy text can I well understand.                       
30      And well I know He said, too, my
husband                  
31      Should father leave, and mother, and cleave
to me;   
32      But no specific
number mentioned He,                        
33      Whether
of bigamy or octogamy;                                 
34      Why should men speak of it reproachfully?                       
35      Lo, there's the wise old king Dan
Solomon;                   
36      I understand he had more wives than one;
                 
37      And now would God it were permitted me                        
38      To be refreshed one half as oft as he!                                
 The Wife suggests that chastity need not apply to all
    women, particularly to those whose husbands have died. Church law defined
    re-marriage as bigamy because the sacrament of marriage united a man and a
    woman for eternity. The wife argues that she never seeks to marry more than
    one  man at any one time (serial
    monogamy).    Although the Wife never broaches
    the subject of divorce (that would have been beyond the pale in medieval
    culture), she would have readily embraced the idea. However, she will draw
    the line at redefining adultery.       
 
39      Which gift of God he had for all his wives!                        
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
40      No man has such that in this world now
lives.                    
41      God knows, this noble king, it strikes my
wit,                    
42      The first night he had many a merry fit                        
43      With each of them, so much he was alive!
                  
44      Praise be to God that I have wedded five!                   
45      Welcome the sixth whenever come he shall.               
46      Forsooth, I'll not
keep chaste for good and all;           
47      When my
good husband from the world is gone,         
48      Some Christian man shall marry me anon;                  
49      For then, the apostle says that I am free                     
50      To wed, in God's name, where it pleases me.              
51      He says that to be wedded is no sin;                            
52      Better to marry than to burn within.                             
53      What care I though folk speak reproachfully                     
54      Of wicked Lamech and his bigamy?                                  
55      I know well Abraham was holy man,                               
56      And Jacob, too, as far as know I can;
                             
57      And each of them had spouses more than two;                  
58      And many another holy man also.                                     
59      Or can you say that you have ever heard                           
60      That God has ever by His express word                           
61      Marriage forbidden? Pray you, now, tell
me.                  
62      Or where commanded He virginity?                             
 Did Jesus ever command virginity?   Where would we be without sown seeds?   Virginity is lauded, but was it intended for all people?   No. It was fine for Paul the apostle, but even he
    admitted that he wouldn’t want everyone to be a virgin.
 
63      I read as well as you no doubt have read                          
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
64      The apostle when he speaks of maidenhead;                     
65      He said, commandment of the Lord he'd none.                  
66      Men may advise a woman to be one,                                
67      But such advice is not commandment, no;                         
68      He left the thing to our own judgment so.                          
69      For had Lord God commanded maidenhood,                   
70      He'd have condemned all marriage as not
good;                
71      And certainly, if there were no seed
sown,                     
72      Virginity- where then should it be grown?                    
73      Paul dared not to forbid us, at
the least,                      
74      A thing whereof his Master'd no behest.                     
75      The dart is set up for virginity;                                     
76      Catch it who can; who runs best let us see.                  
77      But this word is not meant for every wight,
                
78      But where God wills to give it, of His
might.                
79      I know well that the apostle was a maid;                           
80      Nevertheless, and though he wrote and said                      
81      He would that everyone were such as he,                          
82      All is not counsel to virginity;                                             
83      And so to be a
wife he gave me leave                          
84      Out of permission; there's no shame should
grieve             
85      In marrying me, if that my mate should die,                        
86      Without exception, too, of bigamy.                                   
87      And though ‘twere good no woman flesh to
touch,            
88      He meant, in his own bed or on his couch;                        
89      For peril ‘tis fire and tow to assemble;                              
90      You know what this example may resemble.                     
91      This is the sum: he held virginity                                         
92      Nearer perfection than marriage for frailty.
                       
93      And frailty's all, I say, save he and she                              
 God did not create all vessels in his house out of gold.
    Wood serves important purposes as well.    God has given each person a proper gift.    Jesus called out to people to give up everything and
    follow him, but did he intend everyone to live perfectly?   No. And “such am not I”.
 
94      Would lead their lives throughout in
chastity.                     
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
95      I grant this well, I have no great envy                                
96      Though maidenhood's preferred to bigamy;                       
97      Let those who will be clean, body and ghost,
              
98      Of my condition I will make no boast.                          
99      For well you know, a lord in his household,                  
100    He has not every vessel all of gold;                             
101    Some are of wood and serve well all their
days.          
102    God calls folk unto Him in sundry ways,                      
103    And each one has from
God a proper gift,                   
104    Some this, some that, as pleases Him to shift.
           
105    Virginity is great perfection known,                             
106    And continence e'en with devotion shown.                   
107    But Christ, Who of perfection is the
well,                    
108    Bade not each separate man he should go sell            
109    All that he had and give it to the poor                          
110    And follow Him in such wise going before.                   
111    He spoke to those that would live perfectly;               
112    And, masters, by your leave, such am not I.
               
113    I will devote the flower of all my age                                 
114    To all the acts and harvests of marriage.                            
115    Tell me also, to what purpose or end                            
116    The genitals were made, that I defend,                        
117    And for what benefit was man first wrought?
              
 For what purpose were genitals made?   duty and ease in getting, “when we do not God
    displease.”
 
118    Trust you right well, they were not made for
naught.  
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
119    Explain who will and argue up and down                           
120    That they were made for passing out, as known,
              
121    Of urine, and our two belongings small                              
122    Were just to tell a female from a male,                              
123    And for no other cause- ah, say you no?                           
124    Experience knows well it is not so;                                    
125    And, so the clerics be not with me wroth,                     
126    I say now that they have been made for both,             
127    That is to say, for duty and for ease                             
128    In getting, when we do
not God displease.                   
129    Why should men otherwise in their books set             
130    That man shall pay unto his wife his debt?                  
131    Now wherewith should he ever make payment,           
132    Except he used his blessed instrument?                      
133    Then on a creature were devised these things                    
 This ‘blessed instrument’ is not just for
    urination but also for engendering, and it is also not used solely for
    getting an heir.   So, I’ll bear
    no malice to virginity, but In wifehood I
    will use my instrument/ As freely as my Maker has it sent.   And she won’t
    be selfish about it either. She’ll make love as often as she can.   Furthermore,
    she considers her husband to be in debt to her, and the only way he can pay
    that debt is through making love. Until that debt is payed, she possesses
    his own good body.
 
134    For urination and engenderings.                                        
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
135    But I say not that every one is bound,                               
136    Who's fitted out and furnished as I've found,                     
137    To go and use it to beget an heir;                                      
138    Then men would have for chastity no care.                        
139    Christ was a maid, and yet shaped like a man,                   
140    And many a saint, since this old world began,                    
141    Yet has lived ever in perfect chastity.                                
142    I bear no malice to virginity;                                         
143    Let such be bread of purest white wheat-seed,            
144    And let us wives be called but barley bread;               
145    And yet with barley bread (if Mark you scan)             
146    Jesus Our Lord refreshed full many a man.                
147    In such condition as God places us                               
148    I'll persevere, I'm not fastidious.                                  
149    In wifehood I will
use my instrument                            
150    As freely as my Maker
has it sent.                              
151    If I be niggardly, God give me sorrow!                        
152    My husband he shall have it, eve and morrow,
          
153    When he’s pleased to come forth and pay his
debt.           
154    I'll not delay, a husband I will get                                      
155    Who shall be both my debtor and my thrall                       
156    And have his tribulations therewithal                                  
157    Upon his flesh, the while I am his wife.                              
158    I have the power during all my life                                     
159    Over his own good body, and not he.                               
160    For thus the apostle told it unto me;                                  
161    And bade our husbands that they love us well.                  
162 And all this pleases me whereof I tell.
   
163    Up rose the pardoner, and that anon.                           
 The Pardoner’s Interruption:   Mock Outrage:   “I knew it! Now I’ll never marry!”   What makes this line so funny?   The Wife responds that she will tell of her experience
    in marriage, and then he can decide for himself whether marriage should be
    for him.
 
164    Now dame, said he, by God and by Saint John,           
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
165    You are a noble preacher in this case!                         
166    I was about to wed a wife, alas!                                    
167    Why should I buy this on my flesh so dear?                
168    No, I would rather wed no wife this year.                     
169    But wait, said she, my tale is not begun;                            
170    Nay, you shall drink from out another tun                          
171    Before I cease, and savour worse than ale.                       
172    And when I shall have told you all my tale                         
173    Of tribulation that is in marriage,                                        
174    Whereof I've been an expert all my age,                            
175    That is to say, myself have been the whip,                         
176    Then may you choose whether you will go sip                   
177    Out of that very tun which I shall broach.                          
178    Beware of it ere you too near approach;                           
179    For I shall give examples more than ten.                            
180    Whoso will not be warned by other men                           
181    By him shall other men corrected be,                                
182    The self-same words has written Ptolemy;                         
183    Read in his Almagest and find it there.                               
184    Lady, I pray you, if your will it were,                            
185    Spoke up this pardoner, as you began,                        
186    Tell forth your tale, nor spare for any man,                 
187    And teach us younger men of your technique.
            
188    Gladly, said she, since it may please, not
pique.                 
189    But yet I pray of all this company                                      
190    That if I speak from my own phantasy,                              
191    They will not take amiss the things I say;                           
192    For my intention's only but to play.                                    
193    Now, sirs, now will I tell you forth my tale.                        
194 And as I may drink ever wine and ale,
   
195    I will tell truth of husbands that I've
had,                     
196    For three of them were good and two were bad.
         
197    The three were good men and were rich
and old.        
198    Not easily could they the promise hold                              
199    Whereby they had been bound to cherish me.                   
200    You know well what I mean by that, pardie!                     
201    So help me God, I laugh now when I think                        
 The Wife’s Tale of Her Five Husbands:   How does she teach her first three husbands to be happy?   The first three were old and rich, and they loved her
    madly. Therefore, they should live happily ever after. Right? No? What will
    each of these three husbands fear?    (Typically, the
    medieval woman surrendered all power once she had married. Why? How did the
    Wife control her husbands after marriage?)   In return for her love, she demanded payment. She
    reasons that she already had their love. That is not enough. Why? They
    would not value her properly if she did not demand something more. “Fine
    things from the fair.”  By
    forcing these men to woo her continually, she makes them happy. Why is
    that? Is she interested in the “fine things”?    
 
202    How pitifully by night I made them swink;
                  
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
203    And by my faith I set by it no store.                                  
204    They'd given me their gold, and treasure more;
                 
205    I needed not do longer diligence                                       
206    To win their love, or show them reverence.                       
207    They all loved me so well, by God above,                         
208    I never did set value on their love!                                     
209    A woman wise will strive continually                                 
210    To get herself loved, when she's not, you see.
                  
211    But since I had them wholly in my hand,                            
212    And since to me they'd given all their
land,                 
213    Why should I take heed, then, that I should
please,   
214    Save it were for my
profit or my ease?                        
215    I set them so to work, that, by my fay,                              
216    Full many a night they sighed out 'Welaway!'                     
217    The bacon was not brought them home, I trow,                 
218    That some men have in Essex at Dunmowe.                      
219    I governed them so well, by my own law,                     
220    That each of them was happy as a daw,                       
221    And fain to bring me fine things from the fair.
            
222    And they were right glad when I spoke them
fair;       
223    For God knows that I nagged them mercilessly.
        
224    Now hearken how I bore me properly,                             
225    All you wise wives that well can understand.                     
226    Thus shall you speak and wrongfully demand;                   
 What other strategies would she use to demand equality?   She lied to them regularly, guiltlessly, and brazenfacedly:   “You like the neighbor’s wife more than you like me!
    Why? She’s better dressed! Therefore, you must be cheating on me.”   “Ha! I caught you whispering with our maid! You lecher!”
 
227    For half so brazenfacedly can no man                             
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
228    Swear to his lying as a woman can.                                   
229    I say not this to wives who may be wise,                           
230    Except when they themselves do misadvise.                      
231    A wise wife, if she knows what's for her good,
                 
232    Will swear the crow is mad, and in this mood                    
233    Call up for witness to it her own maid;                              
234    But hear me now, for this is what I said.                            
235    'Sir Dotard, is it thus you stand today?                        
236    Why is my neighbour's wife so fine and gay?              
237    She's honoured over all where'er she goes;                
238    I sit at home, I have no decent clo’es.                          
239    What do you do there at my neighbour's house?         
240    Is she so fair? Are you so amorous?                            
241    Why whisper to our maid? Benedicite!                        
 How Husbands Typically Treat
    Their Wives: 
 
242    Sir Lecher old, let your seductions be!                         
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
243    And if I have a gossip or a friend,                                     
244    Innocently, you blame me like a fiend                                
245    If I but walk, for company, to his house!                           
246    You come home here as drunken as a mouse,                   
247    And preach there on your bench, a curse on
you!              
248    You tell me it's a great misfortune, too,                              
249    To wed a girl who costs more than she's worth;
               
250    And if she's rich and of a higher birth,                                
251    You say it's torment to abide her folly                               
252    And put up with her pride and melancholy.                        
253    And if she be right fair, you utter knave,                            
254    You say that every lecher will her have;                             
255    She may no while in chastity abide                                    
256    That is assailed by all and on each side.                             
257    'You say, some men desire us for our gold,                       
258    Some for our shape and some for fairness told:
                
259    And some, that she can either sing or dance,                     
260    And some, for courtesy and dalliance;                               
261    Some for her hands and for her arms so small;                  
 She would turn the typical husband’s complaints against
    him:   If I have a friend, you accuse me of gossiping. If I go
    for a walk, you accuse me of infidelity. And then you come home drunk and
    abuse me.   Either you complain that you married beneath yourself
    and your wife is not worth the money you have to spend on her, or you say
    that you have to put up with a rich wife’s pride.   If she’s pretty, you assail her faithfulness. If she’s
    ugly, you say that she hankers after every man.
 
262    Thus
all goes to the devil in your tale.                                
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
263    You say men cannot
keep a castle wall                        
264    That's
long assailed on all sides, and by all.                
265    'And if
that she be foul, you say that she                     
266    Hankers
for every man that she may see;                   
267    For like a spaniel will she leap on him                                
268    Until she finds a man to be victim;                                     
269    And not a grey goose swims there in the lake                    
270    But finds a gander willing her to take.                                
271    You say, it is a hard thing to enfold                                   
272    Her whom no man will in his own arms hold.                     
273    This say you, worthless, when you go to bed;                    
274    And that no wise man needs thus to be wed,                     
275    No, nor a man that hearkens unto Heaven.                 
 Husbands argue that only three things can drive men from
    their homes: a leaky roof, fire and a contentious wife.
 
276    With
furious thunder-claps and fiery levin                   
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
277    May your thin, withered, wrinkled neck be
broke:     
278    'You say that dripping eaves, and also smoke,            
 Men say that since women hide their vices until married,
    they should be tried out, like oxen, to make sure they are not broken or
    damaged- like a horse or a pot or a set of clothes.    
 
279    And wives contentious, will make men to flee             
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
280    Out of their houses; ah, benedicite!                                
281    What ails such an old fellow so to chide?                          
282    'You say that all we wives our vices hide                     
283    Till we are married, then we show them well;              
284    That is a scoundrel's proverb, let me tell!
                   
285    'You say that oxen, asses, horses, hounds                         
286    Are tried out variously, and on good grounds;                   
287    Basins and bowls, before men will them buy,                     
288    And spoons and stools and all such goods you
try.            
289    And so with pots and clothes and all array;                       
290    But of their wives men get no trial, you say,                       
 Men say that women are unhappy unless constantly
    flattered, given gifts, and made the object of undivided attention; unless
    our families, even our servants receive endless praise.   You say we shouldn’t go out walking with young and
    handsome men—like Young Jenkin (incidentally, her next husband.) 
 
291    Till they are married, base old dotard you!                        
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
292    And then we show what evil we can do.                           
293    'You say also that it displeases me                                    
294    Unless you praise and flatter my beauty,                            
295    And save you gaze always upon my face                           
296    And call me lovely lady every place;                                 
297    And save you make a feast upon that day                         
298    When I was born, and give me garments gay;                    
299    And save due honour to my nurse is paid                          
300    As well as to my faithful chambermaid,                              
301    And to my father's folk and his allies-                                
302    Thus you go on, old barrel full of lies!
                           
303    'And yet of our apprentice, young Jenkin,
                      
304    For his crisp hair, showing like gold so fine,
                      
305    Because he squires me walking up and down,                   
 You say that you must hide the keys to your strong box
    from me. Isn’t it my gold just the same as yours?
 
306    A false suspicion in your mind is sown;                              
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
307    I'd give him
naught, though you were dead tomorrow.                                          
308    'But tell me this, why do you hide, with
sorrow,                 
309    The keys to your strong-box away from me?                    
310    It is my gold as well as yours, pardie.                                
311    Why would you make an idiot of your dame?                    
312    Now by Saint James, but you shall miss your
aim,             
 How Husbands Should Treat
    Their Wives.
 
313    You shall not be, although like mad you scold,
                 
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
314    Master of both my body and my gold;                              
315    One you'll forgo in spite of both your eyes;                        
316    Why need you seek me out or set on spies?                      
317    I think you'd like to lock me in your chest!                        
 Instead, you should give us the freedom to spend what we
    want and to go where we wish when we wish.
 
318    You should say: Dear wife, go where
you like best,    
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
319    Amuse yourself, I will believe no tales;                              
320    You're my wife Alis true, and truth prevails.                      
321    We love no man that guards us or gives charge                 
322    Of where we go, for we will be at large.                            
323    'Of all men the most blessed may he be,                            
324    That wise astrologer, Dan Ptolemy,                                   
 Key Idea: The wise
    man does not care what others think of him: he also is not  jealous of another’s happiness.
    Only this man will have the confidence to earn a woman’s fidelity!
 
325    Who says this proverb in his Almagest:                             
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
326    Of all
men he's in wisdom the highest                          
327    That
nothing cares who has the world in hand.            
328    And by this
proverb shall you understand:                  
329    Since
you've enough, why do you reck or care            
330    How
merrily all other folks may fare?                          
331    He is too
much a niggard who's so tight                       
332    That from
his lantern he'll give none a light.               
333    For he'll have
never the less light, by gad;                  
 You say we should not get dressed up in costly array
    because that endangers our chastity.
 
334    Since
you've enough, you need not be so sad.             
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
335    'You say, also, that if we make us gay                               
336    With clothing, all in costliest array,                                 
337    That it's a danger to our chastity;                                       
338    And you must back the saying up, pardie!                         
339    Repeating these words in the apostle's name:                     
340    In habits meet for chastity, not shame,                               
341    Your women shall be garmented, said he,                         
342    And not with broidered hair, or jewellery,                         
343    Or pearls, or gold, or costly gowns and chic;                    
344    After your text and after your rubric                                  
 You said I was like a cat who needed to have her fur
    singed rather than sleek and gay.    
 
345    I will not follow more than would a gnat.                           
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
346    You said this, too, that I was like a cat;
                           
347    For if one care to singe a cat's furred skin,                        
348    Then would the cat remain the house within;
349    And if the cat's coat be all sleek and gay,                          
350    She will not keep in house a half a day,                             
351    But out she'll go, ere dawn of any day,                              
352    To show her skin and caterwaul and play.                         
353    This is to say, if I'm a little gay,                                          
354    To show my rags I'll gad about all day.                             
 FOOL! None of this could prevent me from cheating on you
    if I wished. Furthermore, I could delude you  EASILY if I wished. The ONLY thing that prevents  me from doing so is….?
 
355    'Sir Ancient Fool, what ails you with your
spies?               
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
356    Though you pray Argus, with his hundred eyes,          
357    To be my body-guard and do his best,                          
358    Faith, he sha'n't hold me, save I am modest;               
359    I could delude him easily- trust me!                             
360    'You said, also, that there are three things-
three-              
361    The which things are a trouble on this earth,                      
362    And that no man may ever endure the fourth:                     
363    O dear Sir Rogue, may Christ cut short your
life!              
 What miseries compare to the HELL of living with a WIFE?   The Desert, a land without water   A Wildfire that consumes its fuel.   A Worm that destroys a tree.      
 
364    Yet do you preach and say a hateful wife                          
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
365    Is to be reckoned one of these mischances.                       
366    Are there no other kinds of resemblances                          
367    That you may liken thus your parables to,                          
368    But must a hapless wife be made to do?                            
369    'You liken woman's love to very Hell,                               
370    To desert land where waters do not well.                          
371    You liken it, also, unto wildfire;                                         
372    The more it burns, the more it has desire                           
373    To consume everything that burned may be.                      
374    You say that just as worms destroy a tree,                        
375    Just so a wife destroys her own husband;                          
376    Men know this who are bound in marriage band.'
             
377    Masters, like this, as you must understand,                        
378    Did I my old men charge and censure, and                        
379    Claim that they said these things in
drunkenness;                
380    And all was false, but yet I took witness                            
381    Of Jenkin and of my dear niece also.                                 
 Her strategy: (concocted with her buddies: Alison and Jenkin)   I would accuse them of infidelity (even though I knew it
    was not true.), and this accusation tickled them because the man figures
    that only love could produce such jealousy.   (Reverse psychology)   So…..   My walks with Jenkin?  Spying on my husband!
 
382    O Lord, the pain I gave them and the woe,                  
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
383    All guiltless, too, by God's grief exquisite!
                 
384    For like a stallion could I neigh and bite.                            
385    I could complain, though mine was all the
guilt,                  
386    Or else, full many a time, I'd lost the tilt.                            
387    Whoso comes first to mill first gets meal
ground;               
388    I whimpered first and so did them confound.                     
389    They were right glad to hasten to excuse                           
390    Things they had never done, save in my ruse.                    
391    With wenches would I charge him, by this hand,
               
392    When, for some illness, he could hardly stand.
                  
393    Yet tickled this the heart of him, for he                        
394    Deemed it was love produced such jealousy.
              
395    I swore that all my walking out at night                              
396    Was but to spy on girls he kept outright;                           
397    And under cover of that I had much mirth.                        
398    For all such wit is given us at birth;                                    
399    Deceit, weeping, and spinning, does God
give             
400    To women, naturally, the while they live.                     
401    And thus of one thing I speak boastfully,                           
402    I got the best of each one, finally,                                      
403    By trick, or force, or by some kind of thing,                      
404    As by continual growls or murmuring;                          
405    Especially in bed had they mischance,                               
406    There would I chide and give them no
pleasance;              
407    I would no longer in the bed abide                                    
 Her strategy:   No tickie, no laundry!   Everything is for sale.   They surrendered to my domination; otherwise, I made
    their lives hell.
 
408    If I but felt his arm across my side,                                    
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
409    Till he had paid his ransom unto me;                            
410    Then would I let him do his nicety.                               
411    And therefore to all men this tale I tell,                              
412    Let gain who may, for everything's to sell.                  
413    With empty hand men may no falcons lure;                        
414    For profit would I all his lust endure,                                 
415    And make for him a well-feigned appetite;                        
416    Yet I in bacon never had delight;                                       
417    And that is why I used so much to chide.                          
418    For if the pope were seated there beside                           
419    I'd not have spared them, no, at their own
board.              
420    For by my truth, I paid them, word for word.                    
421    So help me the True God Omnipotent,                              
422    Though I right now should make my testament,                 
423    I owe them not a word that was not quit.                          
424    I brought it so about, and by my wit,                            
425    That they must give it up, as for the best,                    
 And the outcome?   He growled like a lion, but was obedient as a sheep.   He learned to treat me with patience, meekness and
    tenderness.   He suffered like old Job and learned to leave his wife
    in peace.   Since a man is more reasonable, he must display
    patience.
 
426    Or otherwise we'd never have had rest.                       
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
427    For though he glared and scowled like lion
mad,         
428    Yet failed he of the end he wished he had.                   
429    Then would I say: 'Good dearie, see you keep
           
430    In mind how meek is Wilkin, our old sheep;                
431    Come near, my spouse, come let me kiss your
cheek!                                         
432    You should be always patient, aye, and meek,            
433    And have a sweetly scrupulous tenderness,                
434    Since you so preach of old Job's patience,
yes.           
435    Suffer always, since you so well can preach;               
436    And, save you do, be sure that we will teach               
437    That it is well to leave a wife in peace.                         
438    One of us two must bow, to be at ease;                            
439    And since a man's more reasonable, they say,                   
440    Than woman is, you must have patience aye.                     
441 Such were the words I had at my command.
   
442    Now will I tell you of .                                                      
443    My fourth husband,
he was a reveller,                          
 My fourth husband,
    he was a reveler and he cheated on me, and I was young and
    full of passion…   I showed these weaknesses… and he controlled me… For a while… Even though he had a lover, He knew how to get what he
    wanted from me: WINE, and A liquorish mouth must have a lickerish
    tail.
 
444    That is to say, he kept a paramour;                                   
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
445    And young and full of passion then was I,                          
446    Stubborn and strong and jolly as a pie.                              
447    Well could I dance to tune of harp, nor fail                        
448    To sing as well as any nightingale                                      
449    When I had drunk a good draught of sweet wine.
             
450    Metellius, the foul churl and the swine,                              
451    Did with a staff deprive his wife of life                               
452    Because she drank wine; had I been his wife                     
453    He never should have frightened me from drink;
               
454    For after wine, of Venus must I think:                         
455    For just as surely as cold produces hail,                      
456    A liquorish mouth must have a lickerish tail.               
457    In women wine's no bar of impotence,                          
458    This know all lechers by experience.                           
459    But Lord Christ! When I do remember me                     
460    Upon my youth and on my jollity,                                      
461    It tickles me about my heart's deep root.                           
462    To this day does my heart sing in salute                             
463    That I have had my world in my own time.                        
464    But age, alas! that poisons every prime,                            
465    Has taken away my beauty and my pith;                           
 MY VENGEANCE: He cheated on me, so by God, I made him believe the same
    thing about me (even though I never cheated on him.) 
 
466    Let go, farewell, the devil go therewith!                             
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
467    The flour is gone, there is no more to tell,                          
468    The bran, as best I may, must I now sell;                           
469    But yet to be right merry I'll try, and                                  
470    Now will I tell you of my fourth husband.                          
471    I say that in my heart I'd great despite                               
472    When he of any other had delight.                                     
473    But he was quit by God and by Saint Joce!                  
474    I made, of
the same wood, a staff most gross;             
475    Not with
my body and in manner foul,                          
476    But
certainly I showed so gay a soul                            
477    That in his
own thick grease I made him fry                
478    For anger
and for utter jealousy.                                  
479    By God, on earth I was his purgatory,                               
 If the shoe fits, wear it…. And by God I twisted it onto
    his foot!
 
480    For which I hope his soul lives now in glory.                      
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
481    For God knows, many a time he sat and sung                   
482    When the shoe bitterly his foot had wrung.                        
483    There was no one, save God and he, that knew                
484    How, in so many ways, I'd twist the screw.                       
485    He died when I came from Jerusalem,                         
486    And lies entombed beneath the great rood-beam,
             
487    Although his tomb is not so glorious                                  
488    As was the sepulchre of Darius,                                        
489    The which Apelles wrought full cleverly;                            
490    'Twas waste to bury him expensively.                                
491    Let him fare well. God give his soul good
rest,                   
492 He now is in the grave and in his chest.
 My fifth husband: Nicholas from Oxford (and The
    Miller’s Tale)    “He beat me, yet I loved him best.”  He was the best in bed, or so she says….
    later she admits that she married him for love.
 
   
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
493    And now of my fifth
husband will I tell.                           
494    God grant his soul may never get to Hell!                          
495    And yet he was to me most brutal, too;                             
496    My ribs yet feel as they were black and blue,                    
497    And ever shall, until my dying day.                                    
498    But in our bed he was so fresh and gay,                       
499    And therewithal he could so well impose,                     
 Why did she love him best?    Women love best what life denies them, and the Wife was
    growing older….
 
500    What time he wanted use of my belle chose,
              
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
501    That though he'd beaten me on every bone,                       
502    He could re-win my love, and that full
soon.                   
503    I guess I loved him best of all, for he                           
504    Gave of his love most sparingly to me.                        
505    We women have, if I am not to lie,                                    
506    In this love matter, a quaint fantasy;                                 
507    Look out a thing we may not lightly have,                          
508    And after that we'll cry all day and crave.                          
509    Forbid a thing, and
that thing covet we;                       
510    Press hard upon us, then we turn and flee.                         
511    Sparingly offer we our goods, when fair;                           
512    Great crowds at market for dearer ware,                          
513    And what's too common brings but little price;
                 
514    All this knows every woman who is wise.                          
515    My fifth husband, may God his spirit bless!                
 Nicholas and Alsioun, from the Miller’s Tale, reappear?    (Is it Nicholas that she married? Wasn’t Alison her best
    friend!)
 
516    Whom I took all for love, and not riches,                     
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
517    Had been sometime a student at Oxford,                       
518    And had left school and had come home to board
            
519    With my best gossip, dwelling in our town,                        
520    God save her soul! Her name was Alison.                         
521    She knew my heart and all my privity                                
522    Better than did our parish priest, s'help me!                       
523    To her confided I my secrets all.                                       
524    For had my husband pissed against a wall,                        
525    Or done a thing that might have cost his life,
                     
 I’d tell her anything my fourth husband told me, no
    matter how private, ie personal.   Husband #4 went up to London, so I lined up my next
    husband while he was gone: Alsion’s lusty, young friend.   Hey, I didn’t cheat on him. What’s wrong with being
    practical!
 
526    To her and to another worthy wife,                                   
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
527    And to my niece whom I loved always well,                      
528    I would have told it- every bit I'd tell,                                
529    And did so, many and many a time, God wot,                   
530    Which made his face full often red and hot                        
531    For utter shame; he blamed himself that he                        
532    Had told me of so deep a privity.                                      
533    So it befell that on a time, in Lent                                      
534    (For oftentimes I to my gossip went,                                 
535    Since I loved always to be glad and gay                            
536    And to walk out, in March, April, and May,                      
537    From house to house, to hear the latest
malice),                
538    Jenkin the clerk, and my gossip Dame Alis,
                      
539    And I myself into the meadows went.                                
540    My husband was in London all that Lent;                          
541    I had the greater leisure, then, to play,                               
 It was at this point that I found religion!   My friends and I went to vigils, processions, shrines,
    pilgrimages, miracle plays, marriages! And I always wore my favorite
    scarlet skirt!
 
542    And to observe, and to be seen, I say,                              
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
543    By pleasant folk; what knew I where my face                    
544    Was destined to be loved, or in what place?                     
545    Therefore I made my visits round about                            
546    To vigils and processions of devout,                                  
547    To preaching too, and shrines of pilgrimage,                      
548    To miracle plays, and always to each marriage,
                
549    And wore my scarlet
skirt before all wights.                     
550    These worms and all these moths and all these
mites,         
551    I say it at my peril, never ate;                                            
552    And know you why? I wore it early and late.                    
553    Now will I tell you what befell to me.                                
554    I say that in the meadows walked we three                       
 While the cat was away, the mouse played, partied, and
    danced and I went wherever I wanted.   But did I cheat on him?   No, but I did line up a new husband: hell, my mother
    taught me that one.   I told him that he had enchanted me, that I had dreamed
    that he had murdered me!     The Wife interrupts herself, loses the train of her
    story, and then remembers that she had just dreamed of him the night
    before. She never won Nicholas.   Chaucer’s point? ACTING THE ROLE can take on a life of
    its own! (Shakespeare would remember this lesson well!) When we
    play a role in marriage, the mask can become our face.
 
555    Till, truly, we had come to such dalliance,                          
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   KEY MOMENT
    
556    This clerk and I, that, of my vigilance,                               
557    I spoke to him and told him how that he,                           
558    Were I a widow, might well marry me.                              
559    For certainly I say it not to brag,                                       
560    But I was never quite without a bag                                  
561    Full of the needs of marriage that I seek.                           
562    I hold a mouse's heart not worth a leek                       
563   That has but one hole into which to run,                       
564    And if it fail of that, then all is done.                            
565    I made him
think he had enchanted me;                      
566    My mother
taught me all that subtlety.                        
567    And then I said I'd dreamed of him all night,               
568    He
would have slain me as I lay upright,                     
569    And all my
bed was full of very blood;                          
570    But yet I hoped that he would do me good,                       
571    For blood betokens gold, as I was taught.                         
572    And all was false, I
dreamed of him just- naught,          
573    Save as I acted on my mother's lore,                                 
574    As well in this thing as in many more.                                
575    But now, let's see, what was I going to say?                      
576    Aha, by God, I know! It goes this way.                            
577    When my fourth husband lay upon his bier,                       
578    I wept enough and made but sorry cheer,                          
579    As wives must always, for it's custom's grace,
                  
580    And with my kerchief covered up my face;                        
581    But since I was provided with a mate,                               
582    I really wept but little, I may state.                                     
583    To church my man was borne upon the morrow                
584    By neighbours, who for him made signs of
sorrow;            
 When Husband #4 died, I was married within a month. She
    marries Jenkin, the nice looking guy.
 
585    And Jenkin, our good clerk, was one of them.                   
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
586    So help me God, when rang the requiem                           
587    After the bier, I thought he had a pair                                
588    Of legs and feet so clean-cut and so fair                            
589    That all my heart I gave to him to hold.                              
 Yeah, so he was twenty years younger than I was.
 
590    He was, I think, but twenty winters old,                       
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
591    And I was forty, if I tell the truth;                                 
592    But then I always had a young colt's tooth.                        
593     I was, and that became me well;                                      
594    I had the print of holy Venus' seal.                                    
595    So help me God, I was a healthy one,                               
596    And fair and rich and young and full of fun;                        
597    And truly, as my husbands all told me,                              
598    I had the silkiest quoniam that could
be.                        
599    For truly, I am all Venusian                                               
600    In feeling, and my brain is Martian.                                    
601    Venus gave me my lust, my lickerishness,                          
602    And Mars gave me my sturdy hardiness.                           
603    Taurus was my ascendant, with Mars therein.                    
604    Alas, alas, that ever love was sin!                                      
605    I followed always my own inclination                                
 CHAUCER’S
    NEW MORALITY: (611)   His Point?   How is the WIFE’s willingness to follow appetite rather
    than policy evidence of the HOLINESS of her LOVE? 
 
606    By virtue of my natal constellation;                                    
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
    I have never loved for policy, but ever followed my
    own appetite
607    Which wrought me so I never could withdraw                
608    My Venus-chamber from a good fellow.                      
609    Yet have I Mars's mark upon my face,                        
610    And also in another private place.                                
611    For God so
truly my salvation be                                 
612    As I have
never loved for policy,                                  
613    But ever followed
my own appetite,                             
614    Though he
were short or tall, or black or white;          
615    I took no
heed, so that he cared for me,                      
616    How poor
he was, nor even of what degree.                
617    What
should I say now, save, at the month's end,       
618    This jolly, gentle, Jenkin clerk, my friend,                          
619    Had wedded me full ceremoniously,                                  
620    And to him gave I all the land in fee                                   
621    That ever had been given me before;                                 
622    But, later I repented me full sore.                                      
 I’ll tell you about the fight we had which left me deaf.
 
623    He never suffered me to have my way.                              
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
624    By God, he smote me on the ear, one day,                  
625    Because I tore out of his book a leaf,                          
626    So that from this my ear is grown quite deaf.                     
627    Stubborn I was as is a lioness,                                          
628    And with my tongue a very jay, I guess,                            
 My LEARNED husband #5 wanted to EDUCATE me! So every
    night he would read me all the great works about women from classical
    literature—and GUESS WHAT?    They are all SEXIST AS HELL!
 
629    And walk I would, as I had done before,                          
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
630    From house to house, though I should not, he
swore.        
631    For which he oftentimes would sit and preach                   
632    And read old Roman tales to me and
teach                    
633    How one Sulpicius Gallus left his wife                               
634    And her forsook for term of all his life                               
635    Because he saw her with bared head, I say,                      
636    Looking out from his door, upon a day.                            
637    Another Roman told he of by name                                   
638    Who, since his wife was at a summer-game                       
639    Without his knowing, he forsook her eke.                         
640    And then would he within his Bible seek                            
641    That proverb of the old Ecclesiast                                   
642    Where he commands so freely and so fast                         
643    That man forbid his wife to gad about;                              
644    Then would he thus repeat, with never doubt:                    
645    'Whoso would build his whole house out of
sallows,          
646    And spur his blind horse to run over fallows,                     
647    And let his wife alone go seeking hallows,                         
648    Is worthy to be hanged upon the gallows.'                         
649    But all for naught, I didn't care a haw                                
650    For all his proverbs, nor for his old saw,                           
651    Nor yet would I by him corrected be.                               
652    I hate one that my vices tells to me,                                   
653    And so do more of us- God knows!- than I.                     
654    This made him mad with me, and furiously,                        
655    That I'd not yield to him in any case.                                 
 How did he get away with torturing me so for as long as
    he did?   HE HAD THE UPPER HAND!   Being twenty years younger than me, being the best lover
    I had ever had, being the cutest man…..   I took it for as long as I could stand it and then I
    snapped!   She starts to tear up his book (Remember that books were
    very rare and therefore prized possessions before the invention of the
    printing press.)
 
656    Now
will I tell you truth, by Saint Thomas,                        
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
657    Of why I tore from out his book a leaf,
                        
658    For which he struck me so it made me deaf.                      
659    He had a book that gladly, night and day,                          
660    For his amusement he would read alway.                          
661    He called it 'Theophrastus' and 'Valerius',
                   
662    At which book would he laugh, uproarious.                       
663    And, too, there sometime was a clerk at Rome,                
664    A cardinal, that men called Saint Jerome,
                       
665    Who made a book against Jovinian;                                  
666    In which book, too, there was Tertullian,                           
667    Chrysippus, Trotula, and Heloise                                      
668    Who was abbess near Paris' diocese;                               
669    And too, the Proverbs of King Solomon,                       
670    And Ovid's Art, and books full many a
one.                    
671    And all of these were bound in one volume.                      
   You won’t find the WIFE’s role model in classical or in
    sacred literature!   She’s BRAND NEW! (at the very least unseen on earth
    for a good three thousand years!)   THE LIBERATED WOMAN
 
672    And
every night and day 'twas his custom,                        
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   CHAUCER’S POINT?
    
673    When he had leisure and took some vacation                    
674    From all his other worldly occupation,                               
675    To read, within this book, of wicked wives.                      
676    He knew of them more legends and more lives                  
677    Than are of good wives written in the Bible.                      
678    For trust me, it's impossible, no libel,                                 
679    That any cleric shall speak well of wives,                           
680    Unless it be of saints and holy lives,                                   
681    But naught for other women will they do.                          
682    Who painted first the lion, tell me who?                             
683    By God, if women had but written stories,                         
684    As have these clerks within their oratories,                        
685    They would have written of men more wickedness
           
686    Than all the race of Adam could redress.                          
687    The children of Mercury and of Venus                              
688    Are in their lives antagonistic thus;                                     
689    For Mercury loves wisdom and science,                           
690    And Venus loves but pleasure and expense.                      
691    Because they different dispositions own,                           
692    Each falls when other's in ascendant shown.                      
693    And God knows Mercury is desolate                                
694    In Pisces, wherein Venus rules in state;                             
695    And Venus falls when Mercury is raised;                           
696    Therefore no woman by a clerk is praised.                        
697    A clerk, when he is old and can naught do                        
698    Of Venus' labours worth his worn-out shoe,                      
699    Then sits he down and writes, in his dotage,                      
700    That women cannot keep vow of marriage!                       
701    But now to tell you, as I started to,                                   
702    Why I was beaten for a book, pardieu.                             
703    Upon a night Jenkin, who was our sire,                             
704    Read in his book, as he sat by the fire,                              
705    Of Mother Eve who, by her wickedness,                        
706    First brought mankind to all his wretchedness,
                  
707    For which Lord Jesus Christ Himself was slain,
                
708    Who, with His heart's blood, saved us thus
again.              
709    Lo here, expressly of woman, may you find                       
710    That woman was the ruin of mankind.                               
711    Then read he out how Samson lost his
hairs,                    
712    Sleeping, his leman cut them with her shears;                     
713    And through this treason lost he either eye.                        
714    Then read he out, if I am not to lie,                                    
715    Of Hercules, and Deianira's desire                                  
716    That caused him to go set himself on fire.                          
717    Nothing escaped him of the pain and woe                         
718    That Socrates had with his spouses two;
                         
719    How Xantippe threw piss upon his head;                          
720    This hapless man sat still, as he were dead;                       
721    He wiped his head, no more durst he complain                  
722    Than 'Ere the thunder ceases comes the rain.'                    
723    Then of Pasiphae, the queen of Crete,                             
724    For cursedness he thought the story sweet;                       
725    Fie! Say no more- it is an awful thing-                               
726    Of her so horrible lust and love-liking.                               
727    Of Clytemnestra, for her lechery,                                   
728    Who caused her husband's death by treachery,                 
729    He read all this with greatest zest, I vow.                           
730    He told me, too, just when it was and how                        
731    Amphiaraus at Thebes lost his life;                                  
732    My husband had a legend of his wife                                 
733    Eriphyle who, for a brooch of gold,                                 
734    In secrecy to hostile Greeks had told                                
735    Whereat her husband had his hiding place,                        
736    For which he found at Thebes but sorry grace.                  
737    Of Livia and Lucia told he me,                                          
738    For both of them their husbands killed, you
see,                
739    The one for love, the other killed for hate;                         
740    Livia her husband, on an evening late,                              
741    Made drink some poison, for she was his foe.                   
742    Lucia, lecherous, loved her husband so                            
743    That, to the end he'd always of her think,                          
744    She gave him such a, philtre, for love-drink,                      
745    That he was dead or ever it was morrow;                         
746    And husbands thus, by same means, came to
sorrow.       
747    Then did he tell how one Latumius                                  
748    Complained unto his comrade Arrius                                
749    That in his garden grew a baleful tree                                
750    Whereon, he said, his wives, and they were
three,             
751    Had hanged themselves for wretchedness and
woe.          
752    'O brother,' Arrius said, 'and did they so?                         
753    Give me a graft of that same blessed tree                          
754    And in my garden planted it shall be!'                                
755    Of wives of later date he also read,                              
756    How some had slain their husbands in their bed
         
757    And let their lovers shag them all the night                 
758    While corpses lay upon the floor upright.                    
759    And some had driven nails into the brain                     
760    While husbands slept and in such wise were
slain.      
761    And some had given them poison in their drink.
         
762    He told more evil than the mind can think.                         
763    And therewithal he knew of more proverbs                       
764    Than in this world there grows of grass or herbs.               
765    'Better,' he said, 'your habitation be                                   
766    With lion wild or dragon foul,' said he,                              
767    'Than with a woman who will nag and chide.'                    
768    'Better,' he said, 'on the housetop abide                            
769    Than with a brawling wife down in the house;                    
770    Such are so wicked and contrarious                                  
771    They hate the thing their husband loves, for aye.'               
772    He said, 'a woman throws her shame away                       
773    When she throws off her smock,' and further, too:             
774    'A woman fair, save she be chaste also,                            
775    Is like a ring of gold in a sow's nose.'                                
776    Who would imagine or who would suppose                      
777    What grief and pain were in this heart of mine?                  
778    And when I saw he'd never cease, in fine,                
 The Fight!
 
779    His reading in this cursed book at night,                 
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
780    Three leaves of it I snatched and tore outright         
781    Out of his book, as he read on; and eke                  
782    I with my fist so took him on the cheek                   
783    That in our fire he reeled and fell right down.           
784    Then he got up as does a wild lion,                         
785    And with his fist he struck me on the head,              
786    And on the floor I lay as I were dead.                     
787    And when he saw how limp and still I lay,                
788    He was afraid and would have run away,                 
789    Until at last, out of my swoon I made:                     
790    'Oh, have you slain me, you false thief?' I said,        
791    'And for my land have you thus murdered me?         
792    Kiss me before I die, and let me be.'                      
793    He came to me and near me he knelt down,             
794    And said: 'O my dear sister Alison,                        
795    So help me God, I'll never strike you more;             
796    What I have done, you are to blame therefor.          
797    But all the same forgiveness now I seek!'               
798    And thereupon I hit him on the cheek,                    
799    And said: 'Thief, so much vengeance do I wreak!      
 We made up, and we are still married, but I do what I
    wish. And I never cheated on him!   I’m on this pilgrimage to find a new husband.
 
800    Now will I die; I can no longer speak!'                    
   
   
 
   
   
     
  
     
   
801    But at the last, and with much care and woe,            
802    We made it up between ourselves. And so               
803    He put the bridle reins within my hand                    
804    To have the governing of house and land;               
805    And of his tongue and of his hand, also;                  
806    And made him burn his book, right then, oho!             
807    And when I had thus gathered unto me                   
808    Masterfully, the entire sovereignty,                       
809    And he had said: 'My own true wedded wife,            
810    Do as you please the term of all your life,               
811    Guard your own honour and keep fair my state'-       
812    After that day we never had debate.                            
813    God help me now, I was to him as kind                            
814    As any wife from Denmark unto Ind,                                
815    And also true, and so was he to me.                                 
816    I pray to God, Who sits in majesty,                                   
817    To bless his soul, out of His mercy dear!                           
818 Now will I tell my tale, if you will hear.
 
   
819    The friar laughed when he had heard all this.                    
820    Now dame, said he, so have I joy or bliss                         
821    This is a long preamble to a tale!                                       
822    And when the summoner heard this friar's hail,                
823    Lo, said the summoner, by God's arms two!                     
824    A friar will always interfere, mark you.                              
825    Behold, good men, a housefly and a friar                           
826    Will fall in every dish and matters higher.                           
827    Why speak of preambling; you in your gown?                   
828    What! Amble, trot, hold peace, or go sit down;                 
829    You hinder our diversion thus to inquire.                           
830    Aye, say you so, sir summoner? said the friar,                   
831    Now by my faith I will, before I go,                                  
832    Tell of a summoner such a tale, or so,                               
833    That all the folk shall laugh who're in this place'                  
834    Otherwise, friar, I beshrew your face,                               
835    Replied this summoner, and beshrew me                           
836    If I do not tell tales here, two or three,                              
837    Of friars ere I come to Sittingbourne,                                
838    That certainly will give you cause to mourn,                       
839    For well I know your patience will be gone.                      
840    Our host cried out, Now peace, and that anon!                 
841    And said he: Let the woman tell her tale.                           
842    You act like people who are drunk with ale.                      
843    Do, lady, tell your tale, and that is best.                             
844    All ready, sir, said she, as you request,                              
845    If I have license of this worthy friar.                                   
846    Yes, dame, said he, to hear you's my desire.